My Kid is the Quarterback!

We are a football family.  All three of my boys have played football.  (My daughter wished she could, and is counting down to the high school powder puff game.)  

My oldest and youngest sons have both played the position of quarterback.  This is either a really, really good thing or a really, really bad thing.  There have been many highs where my kid is the one who throws the amazing pass down the field or runs for a touchdown, and everyone loves him.  However, most of the time he is the one getting beat up, and is criticized for his every move.

Yesterday was one of those beating up times for my youngest son, Marshall.  Their game against our rivals didn’t go so well, ending 30-0.  Our offensive line couldn’t hold our opponent back at all, and Marshall didn’t have 2 seconds to make a play before he was sacked – over and over and over again.  As I watched him struggle to rise once again and limp back to the huddle, I was frustrated.  I was ready to go get my son, drag him off the field, and quit this game of football once and for all!  (Imagine the horror!)

Then, I thought of our oldest son, Mitchell, and how the game of football instilled in him the discipline, the perseverance, the fight and grit to do hard things.  I have watched him grow into a man, serve a two-year mission for our church in Nicaragua (which was anything but easy), and now return and work hard to reach his goals.  I can see how getting beat down in his 10 years of football, and rising each time he fell to try again, has made him into the person he is today.

I thought of Marshall’s life, and the struggles he will face.  Life is a fight sometimes, and I hope he won’t succumb to the opposition he faces and take the easy road or listen to the naysayers that always seem to be there when we are getting close to our goals.  I hope he will, as I watched him do today, get up after each setback, more determined and with a fire inside to fight for success. 

This game left him muddy, bruised, sore, and worn out!  How many times does life do this to us?  Marshall was such an example and inspiration to me today.  I am going to remember the look in his eyes the next time I face a really difficult challenge, fail, or just feel exhausted by life.  I hope I can with renewed determination get up and fight on. 

Weeds

I love summer rainstorms- the sudden cool in the midst of sweltering days and the smell of fresh, wet earth.  I also have discovered that right after a summer rain is the perfect time to pull the weeds that seem to turn up overnight at these times.  With the ground soft and the morning cool, I head out to pluck the weeds around my flowers.  One morning as I did this, I was probably grumbling, “Why do we have to have weeds anyway?”  (My silent prayers often go on like this throughout the day.)  On this particular day, the words came into my mind that the Lord told Adam in the Garden of Eden, “Cursed is the ground for thy sake…thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee…In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread” (Genesis 3:17-19 KJV).   I had never really thought about those words, that these things were for Adam’s sake.  Somehow weeds, thorns, thistles – having to get up and work hard to accomplish something – would be for our sake, for our good, for our progression and improvement.

We live in a day when leisure, entertainment, weekends, vacations, and retiring early are valued and celebrated.  Work – in and of itself- is seen as drudgery and punishment.  And getting something for nothing, working the system, and living off the government are becoming more and more common.  Now, I am the first to admit that my ultimate goal in life is to have a gardener to make my yard beautiful without having to contribute my own time, sweat, and backaches.  However, on this summer morning, I realized why that may not be a blessing.  The satisfaction of working for a goal, seeing it through even when it’s not easy, having a purpose, and serving our families and communities – and the character and personal progression gained in the process - these are the true blessings.  Maybe weeds truly are for my sake.

But why do we have to have mosquitoes?

Sewage or Fertilizer

This entry was written with my husband Mont and distributed last Sunday as a message to members of our church congregation:

Recently, my husband and I were in the car, and we broke down…right in front of the sewage treatment plant.  We called for help, and started to wait.  We immediately recognized that this was not going to be a pleasant place to wait in the summer heat.   A few jokes about the aroma helped lighten the mood.  However, as help arrived, we realized that we were not just out of gas, and that this was going to be a more difficult problem to fix.  That’s when the silent prayers for help and strength from above began.  With one more car in need of repair on top of our other current challenges, it was clear that our new situation was a little like our break- down.  We were stuck in an unpleasant place, not wanting to be there, and not knowing why or how long before we would be delivered from our many stresses.  It was easy to feel overwhelmed and discouraged.

We all face trials now and then, yet sometimes we feel like Job, being assaulted with problems on every side.  One of my favorite quotes is this: "If for a while the harder you try, the harder it gets, take heart.  So it has been with the best people who ever lived” (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland).  Perhaps a few reminders we learned from this experience can help us get through difficult times:

1. Choose your attitude.   When bad things happen, how we respond can determine our happiness, and the attitude in our home and family.  Perhaps a little humor about the “stinky situation” can help keep things in perspective.  Definitely, turning to the Lord for strength to deal with our present tests is the best way to keep a good attitude.  Elder Neal A. Maxwell has said, “When some people face adversity, they complain and become bitter. They ask questions like ‘Why does this have to happen to me? Why do I have to suffer this now? What have I done to deserve this?’ But these questions have the power to dominate their thoughts. Such questions can overtake their vision, absorb their energy, and deprive them of the experiences the Lord wants them to receive. Rather than responding in this way, people should consider asking questions such as, ‘What am I to do? What am I to learn from this experience? What am I to change? Whom am I to help? How can I remember my many blessings in times of trial?’”

2.  Ask for and accept help.  We were so grateful to our good friend coming to our aid when we called, and he willingly stood with me under the hood of the car in the hot sun with the sewage odor in the air.  We were doubly blessed with another friend who offered to loan us her car until ours was repaired.  We love to see the care and service that we give our neighbor, but we have also sometimes seen friends struggle needlessly, because they feel they are not that bad off and don’t want to bother someone else by asking for help.  However, when we ask the Lord for help, who does He send?  President Spencer W. Kimball said, “God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another person that he meets our needs.”  What a joy it is to feel the love of the Lord through others when we accept the service offered to us. 

3. Trust in the Lord. Elder Richard G. Scott reminds us that, “Just when all seems to be going right, challenges often come in multiple doses applied simultaneously. When those trials are not consequences of your disobedience, they are evidence that the Lord feels you are prepared to grow more.  He therefore gives you experiences that stimulate growth, understanding, and compassion which polish you for your everlasting benefit. To get you from where you are to where He wants you to be requires a lot of stretching, and that generally entails discomfort and pain.”  The lessons of life are not always fun, sometimes life just stinks!  But we can trust in the Lord that this “fertilizer” in life is for our good - it will help us grow stronger, forge our roots deep in Him, and bear beautiful fruit in our lives.